JOU Articles: week 2

Article 1: High Springs Lieutenant Fired. Written by Cindy Swirko of the Gainesville Sun on January 22, 2010.

This article was about a local police officer who was fired for certain misconduct, like mistreating other employees and untruthfulness. The writing seemed sloppy and thrown-together. After all, I'm pretty sure that in the very first sentence, instead of the word "policies", somehow "polices" wound up being printed and it doesn't make much sense. I don't know if that was on purpose and it's just a term I'm unfamiliar with, but it didn't make me excited to read the rest of the article. Regardless whether the reporter or the editor is at fault, it didn't look very professional. The story was extremely fair because not only did it list the grievances this lieutenant's employer had with his supposed conduct, there was also a testimony from someone who believes the lieutenant was fired unfairly and for illegal reasons. I didn't see any other coverage of this story in other papers because it was very locally-based here in Florida. This article, although it started as unimpressive, and the ending seemed altogether too abrupt, actually made me want to know more about this man's fate. If I had written this article, I would have tried to pay more attention to the basic construction of my piece so that I would have something more coherent.

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Article 2: Foot on Bomb, Marine Defies a Taliban Trap. Written by C.J. Chivers of the New York Times on January 23, 2010.

This article immediately caught my eye while looking at the Sunday paper online. As I read it, I was not disappointed for choosing it. It was compelling, interesting, intelligent and complete. I'm trying not to exaggerate, but it felt like I was reading more than just a simple news article that puts you to sleep. The introduction was smart and captured my attention, and the progression of the story was linear and easy to follow. I especially liked the attention to detail the journalist used; he even went as far as to explain the detonation process and inner workings of the featured Taliban explosive. It gave me a better understanding of what was going on and I felt more connected to the story. Also, the personal coverage (collected quotes from soldiers) made me believe the story was more than just something the newspaper collected out of duty and more like they thought it was truly important. I wouldn't have written this article any other way because Mr. Chivers did a great job and he would be a great example to follow.

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Article 3: Car Slams into Tampa House and Injures 9-year-old Boy. Written by Justin George of the St. Petersburg Times on January 24, 2010.

Immediately after reading the title of this article, I thought the worst. Maybe that's why I chose it. Instead, I was pleased to discover it had a happy ending, which seems to be rare in a world where only morbid articles get recognition. The writing conveyed all the information in an orderly manner, but it managed to keep a lighter tone throughout, which I appreciated. There was almost a little bit of humor in it, like when the lady whose house was destroyed compares her newly-opened living room to a "drive-thru". I would have liked to know more about what will happen to the destroyed house, and especially the driver himself. Not much was released about the driver, so that is what I would've done differently if I had written this. Also, I would've liked to see a statement from one of the children that were sleeping over in the house at the time of the crash- either the boy who was minimally injured or one of the others. All in all, I was happy reading this article and it made me feel glad that no one was seriously hurt.

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Article 4: A Child No Longer, Her Choice is Life- or Death. Written by Michelle Bearden of the Tampa Tribune on January 15, 2010.

I chose yet another depressing-looking article, and this time it was full-on heartbreaking. I happened to be feeling sorry for myself when I started reading this article, and by the end I was ashamed and bawling like a baby. The writing was simple, and by simple I mean not peppered with showy vocabulary and flashy metaphors, and it was perfect. It kept me focused on the core information of the article instead of making me try and decipher what the heck the writer is talking about. The only reason I could consider this story "not fair" was because it didn't have a disclaimer saying "WARNING: you're gonna need tissues". Everything else was great. I especially liked, as I am beginning to discover on a frequent basis, the chronological set-up of the storyline. It began in the present, then had an entire section about the suffering girl's personality and life up until her battle with illness. The conclusion finished back in the hospital room, and the last few sentences were a great yet terrible ending that made me cry some more. As a journalist, I definitely would not have done anything differently because the care and attention to detail put in this story do not need revision.

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